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Health Vs. _______

January 21, 2022

Of all places, I met a woman in a bike shop who has experience with seizures.

While non-epileptic, they have had an impact on her life regardless. If she becomes "too relaxed" she has (what sounds like to me) myoclonic seizures. Little muscle jerks and spasms. She's cut out things she loves in life such as coffee, and has one medication to prevent it, and another to, well, stop it if it gets bad. The latter has highly addictive properties, so she avoids taking it even when she needs it. She has a 10 year old son, and wants to be there for him.

I have never seen a more energetic person who wasn't under the influence of a stimulant. She said she pretty much just keeps moving throughout the day, ducking and dodging moments where she might relax too much. Up and down, up and down. To some extent, I can relate. My seizures happen as I sleep. We don't have a great relationship, sleep and I. But I don't have a 10 year old son, and I don't have to balance the notion of becoming addicted to a medication against having a seizure.

How does one even begin to resolve this? Health versus family? Health versus... well, health?

It is an exhausting cycle for me, and I don't have to worry about addiction or a child. So often we find ourselves caught in corners. I'm glad to have met her (and I'll never forget her name), to see her positive attitude and giddy personality, as it feels a little less lonely knowing we aren't entirely alone.


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